


Be John Watson

by littlewonder



Category: Actor RPF
Genre: Bathroom Sex, M/M, Resolved Sexual Tension, Sexual Roleplay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-14
Updated: 2018-12-14
Packaged: 2019-09-18 02:38:08
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 891
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16986567
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/littlewonder/pseuds/littlewonder
Summary: The sexual tension between Martin and Ben is broken when Martin approaches Ben as John. But when the pretense falls away, Ben is faced with what is truly between them.





	Be John Watson

**Author's Note:**

> [Originally posted to tumblr](https://isitanylittlewonder.tumblr.com/post/156666078919/deduce-my-heart-i-wonder-how-martin-felt-when-he). A continuation of another post.

Ben was frozen. If that’s what this was, not John and Sherlock but him and Martin, he wasn’t sure what he should do. If he let Martin get him off in this bathroom, then he was betraying his wife and child. Martin had just recently broken it off with Amanda, and then this script came, and…

“M-Martin…” Ben began. “I don’t think we should do this –“

“Sherlock, please,” groaned Martin, pressing up against him, pulling the edge of his trousers towards himself. “I need you…”

Ben was thrown into confusion. What exactly was this? As Martin dragged his lips across Ben’s neck, Ben didn’t bother to push him off, but he wasn’t giving in just yet either. With a glare, Martin locked eyes with Ben, and Ben looked down at him. His lips parted, and Ben half-allowed Martin to pull him down into a kiss. Before he knew it, the kiss had transformed, and Ben was letting go, throwing himself into his character as Martin seemed to throwing himself into his. In this moment, they were no longer Ben and Martin, he was no longer an attached man: he was Sherlock, the lovesick junkie wrapped up in the arms of the only man he’d ever loved, pulling each other tighter, kissing each other deeper, completely at the mercy of this spectacular army doctor.

A moan escaped Ben’s throat, and he suddenly knew exactly where he stood, but was helpless to do anything about it. He’d given himself over, and now he was wrapped up in this feeling, too wrapped up to ever want to let go. He was certain that this was where he belonged, right here in this moment. He understood where Martin was coming from too. For years, they’d wanted this, both of them: not just Ben and Martin, but John and Sherlock too. Even if they couldn’t do this, how could they deprive John and Sherlock of their happy ending?

“John,” grunted Ben, voice low and marked by gravel.

“Yes, that’s right, Ben…”

It was then that Ben knew, he understood, this wasn’t just for John and Sherlock, it was for them too. One last rodeo before they were forced to part ways. This script was risky, it could mean the end of ‘Johnlock’, and it was certainly going to be the end of them, like this. If that was where they were all heading, then surely the world was unjust, but at least they could have this.

“Oh god…” Ben moaned, his legs shifting slightly apart, giving in even as a tiny little voice protested against what he was doing.

Martin dropped to his knees. With a gasp, Ben tilted his head down to look at him, but he was already undoing his trousers, pulling them and his pants down to the middle of his thighs, and taking his cock directly into his mouth.

“Ah! John!”

He rutted himself into Martin’s mouth, unable to really stop himself, unable to really stop any of it. Martin held his hips down steady, and Ben surrendered to the touch, letting Martin take over. He sucked him off, so tight, so hot, eventually taking him down to the root. Ben leaned his head back against the door as the sensations overwhelmed him. Martin was so beautiful, so perfect at this. He knew exactly what he was doing, and Ben could only try to brace himself against the door while he did it, trying not to buckle enough to fall down under the pressure.

Ben was vaguely aware he was panting deeper and deeper. He was also aware that he had eventually switched from moaning John’s name to Martin’s. It was all a bit of a gorgeous haze as the pleasure mounted in him, and his body shook, and finally he climaxed down Martin’s throat.

Martin put him back together, closed up his trousers, and stood up to meet his eyes again. “Take a minute, get yourself together. And then come on, we’ve still got work to do.”

And he just left him like that, left him panting on the wall beside the door as he left through it. Ben was left braced against the wall, eventually standing up straight, eventually getting his breath back. But he couldn’t move: his mind was swimming with consequences, with ‘what nows’, with questions about his relationships.

He still had to work with Martin. On this last, horrible script. He still had to face him, after having done this, after knowing that according to the filmmakers, John and Sherlock didn’t really get to have any of this. This ending, this was their unofficial ending. And Ben really didn’t have to feel guilty for it, but he still did. As much as he loved Martin, as much as he loved John and Sherlock, he felt guilty for all of this. Getting it on like some dirty little secret in a bathroom, like a dirty politician, instead of out and in the open with all the romance they truly deserved. And it wasn’t enough, and Ben just wanted more. Even if this was enough for Martin, and it probably wasn’t, it was nowhere near good enough for Ben.

He just wanted more.

Eventually, after what granted was longer than Martin had likely been anticipating, Ben managed to pull himself together, steel himself, and walk back out the door.


End file.
